There comes a time in a woman’s life when her heart is wide open, but her world feels like it’s falling apart. You want love. You want freedom. You want to feel alive again. But at the same time, your reality your children, your finances, your home begs for your full attention.
I’ve been there.
Maybe you have too.
Right now, you might be talking to several people, trying to find comfort, companionship, or even just a spark of happiness. You’re showing different sides of yourself—your fun side, your nurturing side, your emotional depth. And yet, something feels off. You’re drained. Your emotions are scattered. And maybe… just maybe, one of those people is starting to remind you of someone who once hurt you deeply.
Let me tell you something that took me a while to admit:
You can’t heal in the same environment that broke you.
And you certainly can’t rebuild your life while your emotional energy is tied up in six different directions.
Why We Do It
Sometimes, when life is hard, love or the illusion of it becomes an escape. We pour out our hearts to feel seen. We flirt to feel alive. We connect to avoid the silence. But soon, what was supposed to be comforting becomes confusing. Our peace is disrupted. Our energy is scattered. And our purpose becomes blurry.
The truth is:
You are not wrong for wanting love.
You are not wrong for needing fun.
But you are being called to pause. To breathe. To choose yourself.
What Happens When You Give from an Empty Cup
Being a natural giver means your love is often misunderstood. People may see it as flirtation, inconsistency, or indecision—when really, you're just trying to feel human again. You want connection, not confusion. But when you give too much without boundaries, people take without understanding.
And eventually, you feel invisible. Used. Unseen.
Here's What I’ve Learned
1. Too many emotional ties = too much emotional noise.
Your spirit needs silence right now. Your children need structure. You need stability.
2. Familiar doesn’t always mean safe.
If someone reminds you of a painful past, don’t ignore it. That’s your intuition trying to protect you.
3. Freedom is not found in others, it’s built inside yourself.
No amount of conversations, attention, or sweet talk can replace the peace that comes from creating a life that feels whole.
4. You’re not here to heal others right now. You’re here to heal YOU!
Let others carry their own emotional loads. Be kind, but prioritize your sanity.
So What Should You Do?
Pause the romantic energy. Set boundaries. Let the people you're talking to know you're focusing on your life and your healing.
Create emotional space. Don’t ghost just gently step back. The right ones will understand.
Prioritize your children and your peace. Not from guilt, but from power. They are your why.
Stop giving to prove your worth. You’re already worthy even in your mess, even in your silence.
A Love Note to the Woman Who Feels Like Me
You are not broken you are simply in a rebuilding season.
You are not confused you are being called to clarity.
You are not lost you are finally starting to see what matters.
So choose peace over attention. Choose purpose over distraction.
Choose you first, fully, unapologetically.
You deserve to be loved, yes. But not at the cost of your sanity.
Let peace be your new partner until love comes correct.
With love and truth,
Anselma
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